# what should we do?



## helpless (Oct 11, 2010)

My son is an australian, and he's lived with me to stay in china for more than 7 years. 7 years ago, I took him to my country for a spouse visa for australia(offshore)when he was 3 months old. 

when we left australia, my ex refused to sponsor my application anymore. He didn't even send the childsupport in the first 4years. He didn't call his son.didn't play a role as a father in my son's life. The immi wouldn't give me a visa without my ex's sponsor.

Now my son doesn't understand english at all, know nothing about his country. The longer my son stay in overseas, the hard for him to integrate into australian society after his growing up. 

My son says he doesn't want to seperate with me. So he refused to go back all the time. I want him to live and study in australia, but I don't want to seperate with him as well. 

guy at the immi counter told us, situation like this, there's only 2 ways. let him live in china till he is 18. he can invite me to go back with him. but that time my son will be a pure chinese with foreigner's face, or send him back, after his back, his father will be his custodian, I can only visit my son with his father's invitation. antherwords, if my ex does invite me, i can see my son in the next 11years. i will lose my son. after hearing this, my son chose to go till 18. 

I'm in contradiction. mother's love, selfish or whatever, i just don't want. But australia is better for my son. Chinese students spend hundred thousands A$ each year to live and study in australia, because this country is better in everywhere than my country. my son deserve to live in australia, but he hasn't. 

what should we do?

(i know my ex won't invite me because he says he doesn't want to bring trouble, even if I would like to notarize i don't want anything from him)


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## Dexter (May 5, 2010)

This is kind of a bummer... 

Just one thing here. Guys and Immi counter are not always the best source of information. Why don't you try to contact a migration agent/lawyer and see if there is anything more than that. 

Spouse visa rules are that once you have lost your sponsor your visa is cancelled and there is nothing you can do. Unless you are eligible to apply for another visa (PR? Sponsorship?).


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## ShaneASCMigration (Oct 19, 2010)

Depending on what you do for work, and your skills, you may be eligible for a skilled visa. This way your son would automatically be eligible for a visa to come with with you as he is a dependent.

My company, ASC Migration can also help you find accommodation, a vehicle and a sponsor for you if you are suitably qualified. Check out the Skilled Occupations List and visit my website.

Shane K
ASC Migration


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## helpless (Oct 11, 2010)

Dexter said:


> This is kind of a bummer...
> 
> Just one thing here. Guys and Immi counter are not always the best source of information. Why don't you try to contact a migration agent/lawyer and see if there is anything more than that.
> 
> Spouse visa rules are that once you have lost your sponsor your visa is cancelled and there is nothing you can do. Unless you are eligible to apply for another visa (PR? Sponsorship?).


Thank you for your response.
last year, we went to a lawyer, I was told the only way is to find a NONPROFIT ORGANIZATIONS(like cherch), who would like to look after my son in australia. As a custodian, they have qualification to invite me. And the lawyer wasn't sure how long it would take to find such an organization, it costs a fortune, however win or lose.

sometimes, i do think this is a empty sapce in australian law. I don't know how many australian kids are going through what my son is going through, how many will go through this. But this is unfair for these innocence children.
They have rights to choose whom they want to live with, have rights to grow up in their own country, have rights to see their parents. The lawy should protect these children.

I am suffering to make choice, which I have to face everyday. it is so hard to make decision. And it is also too hard for a 7 year-old child to choose.


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## helpless (Oct 11, 2010)

ShaneASCMigration said:


> Depending on what you do for work, and your skills, you may be eligible for a skilled visa. This way your son would automatically be eligible for a visa to come with with you as he is a dependent.
> 
> My company, ASC Migration can also help you find accommodation, a vehicle and a sponsor for you if you are suitably qualified. Check out the Skilled Occupations List and visit my website.
> 
> ...


thank you for your response, as my son is an australian with australian passport, he doesn't need a visa to come back to his country.


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## Ashley Wilis (Oct 29, 2010)

this is a critical family situation where you really feel helpless, take this option aside at meet some agents and lawyers, I bet they surely have something good for you


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## helpless (Oct 11, 2010)

Ashley Wilis said:


> this is a critical family situation where you really feel helpless, take this option aside at meet some agents and lawyers, I bet they surely have something good for you


I met a lawyer. It is hard, specially we are living overseas. I don't know if the public voice will help.


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